James Wong Counselling

Private Eastbourne Counselling Service

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Words that move me

Rainer-Maria-Rilke (from Letters to a Young Poet)

Allow your judgments their own silent, undisturbed development, which, like all progress, must come from deep within and cannot be forced or hastened. Everything is gestation and then birthing.

Ripening like a tree, which doesn’t force its sap, and stands confidently in the storms of spring, not afraid that afterward summer may not come. It does come. But it comes only to those who are patient, who are there as if eternity lay before them, so unconcernedly silent and vast.

Have patience with everything unresolved in your heart and to try to love the questions themselves as if they were locked rooms or books written in a very foreign language. Don’t search for the answers, which could not be given to you now, because you would not be able to live them.

And the point is, to live everything. Live the questions now. Perhaps then, someday far in the future, you will gradually, without even noticing it, live your way into the answer.

 

Healing

I am not a mechanism, an assembly of various sections.
And it is not because the mechanism is working wrongly,that I am ill.
I am ill because of wounds to the soul, to the deep emotional self
and the wounds to the soul take a long, long time, only time can help
and patience, and a certain difficult repentance,
long, difficult repentance, realisation of life’s mistake, and the freeing oneself
from the endless repetition of the mistake
which mankind at large has chosen to sanctify.

by D. H. Lawrence

 

A story that could be true

If you were exchanged in the cradle and
your real mother died
without ever telling you the story
then no one knows your name
and somewhere in the world you father is lost and needs you
but you are far away

He can never find
how true you are, how ready.
When the great wind comes
and the robberies of the rain
you stand in the corner shivering.
The people who go by–
you wonder at their calm.

They miss the whisper that runs
any day in your mind,
“who are you really, wanderer?”–
and the answer you have to give
no matter how dark and cold
the world around you is:
“Maybe I’m a king.”

by William Stafford

 

The Earthworm

Who really respects the earthworm,
the farmworker far under the grass in the soil.
He keeps the earth always changing.
He works entirely full of soil,
speechless with soil, and blind.

He is the underneath farmer, the underground one,
where the fields are getting on their harvest clothes.
Who really respects him,
this deep and calm earth-worker,
this deathless, grey, tiny farmer in the planet’s soil.

Harry Martinson (translated by Robert Bly)

 

Ripening

The longer we are together
the larger death grows around us.
How many we know by now
who are dead! We, who were young,
now count the cost of having been.
And yet as we know the dead
we grow familiar with the world.
We, who were young and loved each other
ignorantly, now come to know
each other in love, married
by what we have done, as much
as by what we intend. Our hair
turns white with our ripening
as though to fly away in some
coming wind, bearing the seed
of what we know. It was bitter to learn
and we come to death as we come
to love, bitter to face
the just and solving welcome
that death prepares. But that is bitter
only to be ignorant, who pray
it will not happen. having come
the bitter way to better prayer, we have
the sweetness of ripening. How sweet
to know you by the signs of the world!

Wendell Berry

Testimonials

As a carer, it has been validating

As a carer, it has been validating as well as challenging, and a great support and safety valve at a difficult time in my life.

Ultimately, the goal is

Ultimately, the goal is to gain greater self-awareness and I think that is where we find healing. Every now and then we are lucky to meet someone who connects with us as both teacher and guide and I feel I have found this in James.

Just full of gratitude…

Just full of gratitude for the fact that you are getting me to think differently about stuff. In appreciation R

For me, James creates a very safe space

For me, James creates a very safe space where I know that I am listened to without judgement. He helps me to get in touch with the feelings that I struggle to express and uses approaches that push me towards finding the answers that I know are there but cannot always say out loud.

On reflection – using the sand tray…

On reflection – using the sand tray – it takes me out of my head and into my heart.

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